


“ Just Friends ”

by RoxieOfficial



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: Alex is too skinny, Alex just wants to be loved, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, I don't know if it has enough angst to be considered angst tbh, M/M, Not important to the plot but i thought it was important to mention it, So does Justin, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-07 01:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14070273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoxieOfficial/pseuds/RoxieOfficial
Summary: Jalex/Justlex/Stoley One Shot inspired by “ When I die, don’t you dare come to my grave and tell me you love me, because those words were the only thing I would have needed to stay. ”





	“ Just Friends ”

**Author's Note:**

> Don't hesitate to comment, it's always a pleasure to hear what you have to say about my works! ;)

Alex needed a reason to stay. That's how it worked with him. He wanted to kill himself, to stop feeling nothing and just _die_. But he needed something more than that in order to accomplish this dark task, something that would set him off. Apparently, the sole desire of dying was not enough.

Suicide was something he had been contemplating for a while now. He heard his tape for the first time three months ago, and Hannah's voice still haunted most of his nightmares. How many times had he woken up in tears, having dreamt of her suicide attempt? How many times had he heard her voice accusing him? _Alex Standall. You caused the hurricane_.

The guilt he has been feeling for these past three months was unbearable. It was a weight too heavy for his frail shoulders. A weight that was slowly crushing him to his bones. All he would've needed in these dark times was a friend.

The closest he had been with someone was Justin, when the brunet had slept at his house for two weeks straight last month. He had felt as if Justin cared about him, but deeply, Alex knew Justin only cared about saving his ass from the streets. People had stopped caring about him long ago.

But, at the same time, Justin had been so sweet to him. He had been there for him when everybody else had let him down. Justin had been a friend to him. But here's the thing: it didn't feel like they were _just friends_. It felt like something more. 

 _Just friends_ didn't look at each other with so much _desire_. _Just friends_ didn't feel jealous whenever the other talked about someone else. _Just friends_ didn't want to kiss each other. _Just friends_ didn't feel butterflies in their stomach whenever they were together. That's how it was when they were together. It always felt like they were on verge of kissing, as if they were waiting for the other to initiate the kiss.

Sometimes, Alex thought Justin felt the same way. All the eye contacts they had in class, Alex couldn't be imagining those, right? He couldn't have imagined the way Justin talked to him, voice softer than when he spoke with the rest of his friends, or the way Justin always had his hands on him, even if it was only his fingertips grazing Alex's skin. Once, when Alex had had some of his stomach pains, Justin had held his hand for an hour, while Alex was in the nurse's office. Justin had even kissed his knucles when the pain had gotten worse. 

And there had been that one time in PE where Alex had caught Justin staring at him as he was getting changed. He still remembers the way Justin had flustered when he realized he had been caught. But what stroke him the most was the way the brunet had been looking at him, as if Alex was a God and Justin, his worshipper. And Alex had loved every seconds of it. Never in his life had Alex felt so beautiful, so _alive_.

Whenever Justin hugged him, he hugged him longer than he should've ( Alex wouldn't complain, though ). He loved the feeling of Justin's arms around his body. He loved it when Justin nestled his nose in the crook of his neck.

 

For all these reasons, Alex was standing in front of the brunet, seconds away from confessing him his love. They were completely alone this time. No one to interrupt them. Alex had joined Justin to the apartment he shared with his mom and Seth. Both boys were out in the hall.

“ Jus, I— I have something to tell you. ”

“ Alex— ” Justin nervously glanced inside from the ajar door. He then stared at Alex's lips. They looked so soft. Justin wondered what they would feel like against his, if he kissed him. Just this once. 

“ We better go outside, before Seth sees us, ” Justin said. He knew it'd end badly if Seth witnessed something he wasn't supposed to, like, them kissing. Justin grabbed Alex's hand, leading him outside. His hands were soft and bony. The kid really needed to put on some weight.

They barely had time to walked through the door that lead outside, before Justin's lips were on Alex's. His hand let go of Alex's, putting it on his waist instead. The blond's hands found their way under the brunet's shirt. Justin's skin was warm under his cold fingertips. They clawed at each other as if their life depended on it.

“ I've been waiting so long for this, ” Alex murmured once they had pulled away. He was out of breath from all the kissing.

“ Look, Alex, I— ” Justin was at a loss for words. “ Right now's not a good time for me, I — For now, it would be better if we were just friends. ” He didn't want to be _just friends_ with Alex, but if Seth were to find out about them, he'd kill him. He wouldn't even hesitate.

Alex's heart stopped for a split second. “ Don't— Don't do this to me, Foley. You can't tell me this. Not after you've just kissed me like a starved man! ”

“ Alex, you don't understand! Seth, he'd— ” _He'd kill me Alex! He'd kill me for loving another man, for being a faggot. And if he doesn't want to kill me, it's because he'd decided to go for you instead._

“ Don't you get it? ” Alex's eyes were filled with tears. “ _I love you._ ”

The brunet's heart started beating faster. Those words. Those three simple words, they carried so much power within them. Justin couldn't resist. He stepped forward, grabbed Alex's face and kissed him with all he had. This boy who had been standing in front of him, asking for love, was everything he had ever been looking for.

“ I love you, too, ” Justin whispered when they had pulled away, panting.

**Author's Note:**

> At first, I was supposed to end this with a sad ending, like, Alex dead and Justin crying on his grave, but I needed to see my cinnamon rolls happy, so I opted for a happy ending instead :)


End file.
